Missing you

Life will never be the same without you. As our car approaches your home, I usually peek to see if you’re out at the veranda or if the light in your room is on. As I come in the house, I ask everyone where you are, hoping that when I run upstairs you’ll be in your usual seat while watching tv when I open the door. If not, you’ll be hanging out in the backyard in your usual favorite spot. Then I will kiss your cheek and you’ll give out your usual joke that I have not taken a bath even it’s obvious that I did cause my hair is still wet. The hugs after we laugh out loud.

Life has changed now. I would cover my eyes every time we would take the turn going to your house, hoping no tear will fall. The usual race in going up the stairs will be replaced by slow steps to delay the sight of an empty chair. The hugs you’ll give will be truly missed as I sit on your cold chair hearing nothing but silence. No more laughs to fill the room. No more shouting TOLI!!!

My usual nights are overflowing with tears and denial that you are gone. We will miss you…